Doorways Can Open By Saying 'No'

The other evening, I heard my Granny's voice as I stood at the bench in our workshop, and pondered on the next creative projects to set into motion.

'Just because you can, it doesn't mean you should.'

Saying 'No' is a powerful thing yet in our society we can feel bad if we do.

A big battle can be within, and how we value ourselves by being seen as useful to others.

If we are asked to help, it is hard to say 'No'.

If we are asked to give up our time and it is something we can do, saying 'No' is hard.

It is hard to say ' No ' if our hearts pull us to make something because we can.

If we can help, it is hard to say 'No'.

There are many moments when we are called upon to step forward and take action, and it is hard to say 'No'.

Our impulse is to say 'Yes'; giving of our energy, effort and time, when we simply do not have these to give.

Early on, Tim spotted my ability to overcommit my energy and time and we made a pact. He is my editor and before I open my mouth and make a promise, I run it past myself first and if I am still unsure, I run it past Tim.

In the past, I could be found knitting like the clappers for those who crossed my path after they had lost a loved one. This inclination was lovingly edited.

I now make essential fragrance oils and soaps for those who are grieving. They offer comfort, and I find the creativity soothing as I personalise each one. There is much love in these gifts. I have been asked if I would consider opening an online store and gearing up to turn these into a commercial enterprise. I even went as far as to cost the items, draw up a business plan and ponder the idea, as I made a few for sale.

A feeling of an old pattern emerged and I wisely ran the idea past my editor. Tim gently pointed out how busy I already was, and he had visions of me in the workshop in the early hours, rushing to fulfil orders and somehow finding time to post them out the next day. He was happy to help if it was a path I wanted to take, but he suggested I look at the bigger picture. I thought about it, then realised it would strip this lovingly meant creativity of any joy. So, for those who have asked, I have offered to make them privately for their loved ones.

We are led to believe that doorways open by saying 'Yes', which is true, and yet, doorways can open by saying 'No'.

Thank you, Tim and Granny Jean. 🩷